The Ultrasound Reveals All

I had planned to have my third pregnancy as low tech as possible, including skipping ultrasounds unless something did not seem right and my midwife wanted to. After Toni found that I was measuring very large for dates she recommended an ultrasound.

When I got to Dr. Rice's office she took me right back for my u/s. Brandon was running late. She put the wand to my belly and immediately we saw two heads pop up. Well it's twins she said! It's hard to describe how I felt at that moment. It was actually mostly relief and excitement. ONLY twins... How hard could that be? Brandon came in just then and saw the two babies on the u/s and smiled! He seemed nervous. Dr. Rice said she thought there were two sacs and two placentas indicating fraternal twins and I was quite relieved. I was an avid birth junkie and knew all about TTTS and how scary it could be. If twins develop TTTS there is an uneven flow of blood through their shared blood vessels (in the placenta) that can kill both of them. Only identical twins who share a placenta can develop this complication.

To be sure the babies were ok (we did not want to know the sex) Dr. Rice recommended we get a more detailed ultrasound at another location.

I asked Dr. Rice is she delivered twins and found out she didn't. I already knew Toni didn't usually so I was going to have to transfer care to an OB. When we left the office that day we had a wonderfully exciting time telling everyone in out family. Everyone was so happy! Many had suspected as much from seeing how big I already was!

Our first look at the babies

July 2012

Ok here's how it all went down...

After we had our two dear sweet children my husband and I were still deciding if we wanted more children.  We knew if we had more children it would probably mean buying a larger vehicle and a larger house.  I wanted more children in my heart but my head said I wasn't a good idea right now.

I pondered over it for months and had finally made peace with this decision in my heart. We would not have any more children or if finances were favorable have two more 5+ yrs down the road.  I was watching a friend's young baby at my home during they day so it made sense that I would be able to enjoy a little baby and be able to help out in this way for at least until she could go to school and I didn't need to keep her anymore. I was also nursing Ehren day and night and he showed no signs of being ready to wean.

A couple of weeks later at the end of June I was going to take out the trash and I caught a whiff of pizza box smell and it made me feel sick to my stomach. It was the same feeling I remembered from my previous pregnancies.  I knew something was wrong.

I decided that maybe I was just having another health issue because I had not missed a period. I was tired and sick to my stomach so I was thinking it must be the flu. I bought a pregnancy test just to rule out pregnancy before going to the doctor. It turned POSITIVE immediately.  That took me by surprise.  How could I be THAT pregnant?  I consulted my chart (we were using NFP) and the only explanation that made sense is that my last period was really implantation bleeding and I was already 7 weeks pregnant.

Telling Brandon

For each of my other children's births Brandon wore a Superman tee shirt.  I ordered him a new  Superman tee shirt and coincidentally when the shirt came in the mail it seemed a bit small so I picked up an additional shirt at the store. When I gave it to him the shirts I told him he would need it!   When I told Brandon he was surprised but very happy!  I think the kids drive him nuts sometimes but he is proud to be a daddy all the same.

Brandon and Lily 2008

Brandon and Ehren 2010

Preparing

I knew right away for this birth I wanted to have a waterbirth at home.  I had wanted a waterbirth with Ehren but didn't like my bathtub when the big day came.  I was going to splurge with this baby and buy the big fancy birth pool with the handles.  I was going to have a photographer and it was going to be epic. So far I was having a rough pregnancy because I was more tired than usual and actually threw up.  I had never thrown up with my other pregnancies.  Sure I felt nauseated but not thrown up. I attributed this to the fact that I was nursing Ehren and chasing around three little children during the day. I was also losing weight and I thought it was kinda awesome and perhaps getting back into prepregnant shape wouldn't be hard this time around.

I scheduled my first appointment with Toni (my midwife) at 12 weeks.  When I got there she measured me (just for fun since its not very accurate until 20 weeks) and noticed I was measuring ahead a cm or so. She looked all around and found the heartbeat on the top left quadrant.  It was healthy and strong. I was excited to be working with Toni again.


That's ODD

My next scheduled appointment was at 16 weeks. In the meantime the baby had a big growth spurt. I didn't really think anything of it. When I got to Toni's office she took my vitals, drew some blood and went to measure me. I measured 12 cm ahead of what we expected. I was measuring like a 28 week pregnant lady would measure instead of my 16 weeks.  Toni told me she wanted me to have an ultrasound to find out what was going on in there.  We looked all over but still only found one heartbeat in the top left quadrant again. I had still not felt any kicks yet.  She told me dates might be off, I might have fibroids or extra fluid or there was more than one baby. I hoped it was only twins, because my dates were right and I was scared of the alternatives which could be serious.

Beginning of 14 weeks

End of 16 weeks

I called Dr. Rice ( a natural birth friendly Dr. In town and scheduled an ultrasound for the next week. Stay tuned for my next post... The reveal!

I'm BACK

Alright, So after almost a year hiatus I decided I should probably start updating my blog again since we won't be traveling as much because we had TWINS since the last update. I plan to fill in with a couple of stories you might find interesting that happened this past year. Here's an adorable little picture to tide you over. 

Spring Fun

Sorry I've been slacking on updating the blog lately.  With kids sick and Brandon out of town I just lost some momentum, but my Mom is wondering what's going on so here's a short update with pictures!

Playing in the sprinkler on the first scorcher of the season

The kids newest projects were finding three tadpoles which we took home and raised as our own children.  Two have turned into American toads and they are named Swirly and Flower.  We made a cute little terrarium for them and have been catching bugs to help them grow big and strong enough to be released into our garden.

The last tadpole (doesn't have a name yet)

Amazing transformation that happens in one afternoon.  The toad is so small it can fit on a dime with room to spare.

10 gallon fish tank turned into a toad habitat

Our garden has been growing well.  We decided to plant only flowers since the dog kept eating our veggies.  We had tons of volunteer tomatoes however so we're going to have lots of tomatoes and I have no idea what kind they will be - cherry, grape or beefsteak?  Guess we'll find out.  The other day we went to the park and caught about 20 lady bugs who have been really enjoying the volunteer sunflowers.  Lily has been picking them and enjoying fresh flowers in her room all week.

Lily and her sunflowers.  (best face she could make out of 30 pictures!)

My perpetual motion machine wearing her favorite new dress from Grandma

Tickling brother with a leaf

Lily loves to decorate and had previously covered her large wall with artwork she taped up with scotch tape.  Because I didn't like the way it looks, we made some magnetic boards that she could stick her artwork to.  She picked out the patter and was really proud of herself!  We made them with oil drip pans (Walmart $11) and a cheap twin sheet set we cut up.

My mother's day card from Lily.  (Yeah, she made it EXACTLY like the magazine instructed)

   I also crafted a new dress for Lily since she is growing so fast.  I took a polo that looked hideous on me and made a cute little dress for her.  I think its darling but I don't think she likes it!

So that's what we've been up to in a nutshell.  This is all I probably have time to update for now while the kiddos are asleep!

Pregnancy, Birth and Beyond: My advice to new moms PART 1

Pregnancy and birth is a subject that is near and dear to my heart.  Having children has profoundly changed me in so many ways.  I have also learned so much (the hard way) since I've become a mother.  I could elaborate all day but most people aren't going to read it so instead, here's a short list I've compiled of things I wish I had known so maybe you can avoid some common pitfalls.  The first three are general rules of thumb to set the framework for a healthy experience and the remaining are more specific.

*Disclaimer - I have had a hospital birth with an OB that included induction and epidural and a natural birth at home with a midwife.  I do not advocate that my way is the only right way.  I want women to make informed decisions and give birth where and with whom they feel safe. The views below are my own with resources are below.*

1. Consider the source - When someone gives you advice they are usually well meaning but not always qualified to dispense the advice. Trust the experts but not blindly.  Do the research and consider your instincts and your child. 

2. Pick your care provider carefully - Find a Dr or midwife you can connect with and trust.  Really research the statistics of safety and interventions for that care provider.  A midwife (in TX) is required to provide those statistics up front.  If your instincts are telling you your provider is not a good fit, do both of you a favor and switch.

3.  Accept responsibility - As tempting as it may be to relinquish your care into the hands of "the experts" you need to be responsible for your own health.  You can get opinions from others but ultimately you must decide what to do.  Its easier to live with the choices you make than the choices you let others make for you especially if things don't go well.  Put on your big girl panties and get the information you need to make the right decisions for you and your baby.

3. Do the research - Experts are people too and can and do make mistakes.  Do not assume any procedure done on you is in your best interest.  Do not assume that your Dr knows what you want without first discussing it. For example, two common procedures that cause more harm than good are immediate cord clamping and episiotomy (1).  Both of these are still routinely done on women and infants without scientific evidence and without consent. These are not the only procedures in this category nor are they the most dangerous or damaging.  A good place to start your research is Henci Goer's book, The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth

4. What you eat matters - What you eat when pregnant really matters and has far reaching health consequences for you and your baby.  Many pregnancy complications can be prevented by careful attention to diet yet most women under OB care are never counseled or referred to a nutritionist.  My personal pregnancy experiences and birth were vastly different when I became aware of this.  A good place to start is, Dr. Brewer's Pregnancy Diet

5. Exercise -  Labor is usually physically exhausting, but it will be smoother if you train for it.  Do as much physical activity as you can during pregnancy.  You will feel better and you won't swell as much.  Do specific exercises like pelvic rocks, squats and tailor sitting to prepare your body for labor and proactively move the baby into optimal position for late pregnancy.
 
6. Nap - Sleep as much as you can when you can and don't feel guilty for it.  Manufacturing a human is hard work!

7. Know your baby - Take the time to ask your care provider how to tell what position your baby is in.  You should be able to tell what your baby is doing with a little practice.  Once you have this mastered you can do exercises to ensure your baby will stay in a position that will make labor easier. (6)  Talk daily and connect with your baby.  You will be working as a team when the big day gets here.

8.  Natural childbirth - You may be under the impression that women who chose to have a baby naturally are macho masochists.  I know I thought that at one time.  What is the big deal?  What so wrong with an epidural?  Once again I found out the hard way.  It turns out the epidural has side effects that nobody told me about! (2)  After having a baby naturally I would never again chose an epidural.  Most women who have had both kinds of birth also prefer natural.  Does that surprise you?

9. Be prepared - If you do chose to go natural, don't assume it will just happen.  The hospital system is not set up to support a natural birth.  You must be determined and prepared.  I would recommend a Bradley Class(3) or Hypnobabies(4) class.  If you are planning on an epidural, remember that they do not always work or you may have a precipitous labor and not be able to have one.  I would prepare for a natural birth/unassisted childbirth in either case.

10.  Consider a Doula - A doula?  Seriously?  That is what my husband is for!  Ok, well that is what the Dr and nurses are for then.  What came a a shock to me was that my Dr was NOT there until the last 20 minutes of the birth and the nurses were busy and also NOT there for me.  It was just me and my husband all alone without knowing what to do.  Turns out expecting a husband to know when/how to support you is asking too much of someone who is probably just as inexperienced as you are.  A doula will take the pressure off of your husband and will bring knowledge that will make your birth go better.  Studies have shown that having a doula as a member of the birth team decreases the overall cesarean rate by 50%, the length of labor by 25%, the use of oxytocin by 40% and requests for an epidural by 60% (5).  Don't leave it to chance that you will have a good nurse who will support and spend time with you.  The nurses work for the hospital, not you. 

11. Eat - If you have a long labor you will probably get hungry.  You can eat if you need to and you don't need permission.

12.  Let go - There are many things in labor you cannot control. If you've done your homework, taken care of yourself and prepared as diligently as you can then it is time to surrender to the process and ride it out.  Labor is not the place for fear and anxiety - this is why I'm stressing mental and physical preparation before D-day.  Birth is as safe as life is. Women were made to give birth and you can do it.  Pray for peace and guidance from God and he will be there to help you out.  Enjoy your birth!

Stay tuned for PART 2 - Breastfeeding

Resources:
1. http://pregnancy.cochrane.org/
2. http://www.natural-pregnancy-mentor.com/epidural-side-effects.html
3. http://www.bradleybirth.com/
4. www.hypnobabies.com
5. http://www.americanpregnancy.org/labornbirth/havingadoula.html
6. http://www.spinningbabies.com/

February 2012

Is it that time again?  The days are long but the years are short.  I guess February blew by because I was so busy!  Brandon went to Sweden on business again, this time for 13 days!  My dear mother drove down to bring my sister to help me out and then Mom and Dad drove back to pick her up at the end of the week.  Very thankful to have family that LOVE me.

Now that I am 30 and "officially old" I'm going to stop coloring my hair and let it grow into its natural color - gray and all!  I figure if I keep it styled nice and work a little harder on not dressing like a slob then I won't LOOK old.  We shall see!  Oh - I need a GOOD stylist in C/S.  I want to pay for a good haircut but have not found anyone here who I like (even paid $50 for one and it was terrible!)  Please send me your suggestions!

I have been working almost every night this month on my quiet book and it is coming along nicely. I'm very excited!  Don't want to brag but it is the most awesome quiet book I have ever seen.  The kids keep trying to sneak into my closet to play with it. I will post pictures as soon as I am done.  It is ridiculously time consuming because I'm doing everything by hand and using the blanket stitch to join all the felt.

About the kids - My little Ehren has slept until 7 in his bed the entire week!  I am so proud of him and really enjoying getting more rest.  Its so weird sleeping through the night again myself because I haven't done it since Summer 2010!

When Brandon got back from Sweden he decided to take Lily ice skating!  She was really excited about the prospect but not as excited about actually skating.  She and Brandon took one trip around the rink before she called it quits.  She wanted to play with the ice and look around but not skate.  She did say that she had fun though.

Lily and Daddy trying out the ice

Now for my mini rant on breastfeeding (this is here just so I don't have to explain it over and over again).  I am still nursing my 14 month old.  I do not find this unusual in a global or historical context.  The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends breastfeeding at least 12 months and then however long after that the mother and baby desire.  The World Health Organization recommends breastfeeding at least two years and however long after that the mother and baby desire.  I plan on breastfeeding as long as my son wants to.  There are health benefits to my baby and to me the longer I breastfeed that outweigh any minor inconvenience extended breastfeeding may cause.  My pediatrician is fine with my not giving my baby cow milk and his blood tests show him to be perfectly healthy.  Ehren does not even like cow milk because he will suck it up and then spit it out all over himself (for fun!).  He also does not like to eat meat or carbs and prefers veggies and fruit (and chocolate) so I'm filling in the gaps in his nutrition by breastfeeding.  I do not make decisions based on what is popular or what everyone else is doing.  I have good reasons for everything I do.  I have a degree in Biomedical Science and my hobbies include researching health related topics so I'm not going to make a decision that affects my children without due diligence.  I don't think I'm always right - that is why I consult the professionals when necessary. :-) /end rant!

Ehren's latest adventures

My boy has grown so much in the past month I can hardly believe the leap in development!  Here's a list of his new accomplishments:

* Walking!  He walks everywhere and he's so proud of himself.  Still can't get him to wear shoes though!  Here's a video of him doing his favorite things - walking and cleaning.

* Self soothing himself to sleep -  For a whole year, Ehren had to nurse himself to sleep, be walked around, or fall asleep next to us.  I have gradually gotten him to read books in his room and then nurse a bit and finally we can put him in his crib and he will quickly fall asleep on his own!  Sweet success with no crying!  I knew it would happen some day and we just had to be patient and not push him to do something he wasn't ready for.

* Sleeping through the night - On 2/2/12 Ehren slept 8 hours from 9:00 - 5:30 am.  So proud of my little man!  The longest he ever slept previously was a 5 hour stretch.

* Sign language -  We started teaching him signs around 9 months or so and he never really seemed interested in learning them.  He really started using them all of the sudden and even seems to want to learn more.  He knows, food, more, thank you, all done, book, please, dog, ball.he also points and says "dat" (that) constantly.

* Reading - Lily wanted to read even as an infant.  With Ehren we were not as diligent about reading to him since things were a bit more chaotic and he didn't seem interested anyway.  BUT now, he has a favorite book.  It's an Eric Carle book about animals and he loves to turn the pages and giggles when I make a lion and sheep sounds.  So glad he wants to read now.  I was thinking he was a dud!

*Bible class - Ehren has had a difficult adjustment getting into Bible class.  He had more separation anxiety issues than Lily and vomits when he's really upset so we had been hesitant to leave him alone in Bible class.  As he's gotten older, he's become less anxious so we tried it again with a lovely grandmotherly lady holding him.  Success!  He made it through class.  Since then he has been spending more and more time in his chair.  Things are looking up.

*Independence - Ehren's separation anxiety issues are completely normal, although he was much more anxious than Lily.  Pushing him to do something that makes him upset is not a "solution" I was willing to try.  From my experience, this exacerbates the problem because the child now doesn't trust the parent and/or suffers from a reassurance deficit and becomes even more anxious and clingy.  With Ehren we needed to be patient and teach him in such a way that would help him learn to be away from us but without making him more anxious or distrustful.  If he will not do what I want him to do, I am willing to be patient and wait until he is ready. I am proud to say that my approach is working and we are seeing great strides toward becoming more independent.

*Playing with Winry - Before I started keeping a little baby, Ehren seemed so much more like a baby.  Now he's helping me entertain the baby and even doing "chores."  He will pick up books, throw away diapers, and play peek-a-boo with the baby.  He will even play by himself and come back to me occasionally for a cuddle and then resume playing.  One day I was holding both of them on the couch and he just took her hand and smiled at her.  It was so sweet!

 Cute little video of Ehren playing a flute!

*Temper tantrums!  Ugh!  I dreaded the day he started these.  He gets mad now and frustrated when denied and will slap the floor with both hands like a little Muslim.  He even threw something when I told him he had to wait.  Poor little dear.  We don't allow this behavior of course and with the way he is, a 1 min time out is working beautifully.  With consistency, I do not think he will be as challenging as Lily was/is.  Ask me in a year if I still think this!

All in all, I'm so proud of my little boy.  He's perfect in every way.  I kissed his head yesterday and he smelled like lavender baby shampoo and chocolate.  I just wanted to drink the moment in and make it last forever.  I am so grateful that God gave me such a precious soul and pray so hard every day that I will be a good mother to him.